{"id":22,"date":"2010-02-08T17:12:54","date_gmt":"2010-02-08T15:12:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/meme.co.za\/?p=22"},"modified":"2011-04-16T12:26:53","modified_gmt":"2011-04-16T10:26:53","slug":"lunch","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/meme.co.za\/?p=22","title":{"rendered":"Lunch"},"content":{"rendered":"

It’s lunchtime, and I haven’t brought anything with to the office today, so I decide to pop down to the supermarket across the road to find something.<\/p>\n

My requirements are simple:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. It must be vegan. I don’t eat processed bits of dead tortured animals – I’m weird that way.<\/li>\n
  2. Because I like orangutans (and rainforests too), I’m not eating anything with palm oil (aka ‘vegetable oil’ aka several other pseudonyms) in it.<\/li>\n
  3. Like a good scientist, I’m invoking the precautionary principle and staying away from anything that could be GM. Damn you and your infernally comprehensive lists, www.safeage.org<\/a>!<\/li>\n
  4. I’ll be damned if I’m going to buy things made by evil companies like Nestle that violently force their shit products onto developing countries and exploit child labour for their chocolate in North-West Africa. I’m talking about you too, Coca Cola.<\/li>\n
  5. Nothing with suspicious looking E-Numbers please; sunset yellow is for crayons, not nutritious meals.<\/li>\n
  6. There’s no stove \/ oven at work, only a microwave. Nothing that needs cooking.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Unsurprisingly, my radical restrictions cut out around 99% percent of the products in the rather large shop (a shop where, tellingly, there are more chocolates and crisps than fruit and veg)…It’s a good thing my social conscience is not particularly focused today, or I’d also be checking for ‘Made in the apartheid state of Israel’ stickers. Commonsense nutrition will also have to take a back seat.<\/p>\n

    Eventually, I settle for the following:<\/p>\n